Part of me wishes that parts of my life were easier, and a part of me realises just how easy my life has been.
There are times where I envy other people's seemingly smooth sailing lives, and then I remember I wouldn't be who I am without the bumps in the road that I've had.
I'm often left feeling guilt ridden for all that I've had, and only wish other's could be as fortunate.
This week emphasised something I already knew, which was, I always seems to feel fear when something easy comes to me, whether that's
- a pass in an exam
- getting a dream job - a helping hand from my parents
- a friendship/relationship has been formed so easily. .
- even when my morning commute is straight forward
... I just feel uncomfortable with it 🤷🏽♀️ it's as tho I'm so use to putting in so much effort to just about scrape by in life.
Working hard for something is engrained in me, my parents have been my hero's and they've both set monumental examples through-out my life and placed importance on putting the effort in.
My point is.. I know I need to change my way of thinking and accept that If something does goes my way, or I'm given something with minimal effort, I should embrace it with grace and gratitude rather than guilt 🙏🏼